My Sister Rules Or, Let Me Tell You About My Better Half

My Sister: I think she attends a chain church.
Me: A what?
My Sister: It’s a chain. Like, they have branches all over the country.
Me: Are you kidding me?
My Sister: Nope.
Me: Oh my God. She goes to TGI Jesus.

The first amendment? All about it.
The third commandment, though? Yeah…not so much.